What is the riskiest thing you’ve ever done? How did it turn out?

By Mary Hill

My biggest risks were also my biggest mistakes.  Two times, I married for the wrong reasons and the wrong guys.  I had good intentions to love and help them have wonderful lives.  The first one was a liar.  The second guy was an abuser. Both are dead now; so, I am a two time widow. They died after our marriages end.

I took risks both times. I know I loved them, and I tried to build lives with them, but marriage takes two and takes both to work together, communicate, and be honest with one another.  I was married to the first guy for nine days before he left me and went AWOLfrom the Army. He lied to me the whole time of our engagement and short marriage.   I was married to my second husband for almost 12 years before I had to leave him because of violence spurred by his illness.

You may remember my first husband. About 12 years after our marriage ended, he made national headlines in 1997 when he kidnapped a grandmother in Florida and lead Florida law enforcement on a high speed chase, guns blazing.  The chase ended with him being shot and dying on the side of the highway.  

My second husband story is sadder and tragic.  Let’s just say, he was not a  liar, but he had deep emotional wounds and was terminally ill. He died in 2003, a year and a half after our marriage had to end.  I didn’t want to leave him and end our marriage, but he jeopardized my life when he became violent. I helped him find a hospice situation and tried to make sure he was taken care of, but I could not risk my life anymore. He could not overcome his anger. I accepted that and prayed for him.  I walked away so his anger would not destroy us and maybe he could find peace in the end. I am told that he did.

As you know from my post yesterday, I finally got it right and have found happiness.  What are the outcomes of my choices?  Well, the experiences made me who I am today.  I understand grief and pain. I understand making bad choices, but I know God who can help you to overcome and to build better a life.

So where are you today?  Are you caught in the consequences of bad risks?  There is hope.  Reach out for help. People are near and care where ever you are.  God also hears prayers.  He will help you. Just ask. 

I have posted another blog on finding help if you are in a domestic violence situation on my Blogher page at :  http://www.blogher.com/risks-or-choices-you-deserve-happiness-and-safety-no-matter-what

If you are that woman, you deserve happiness. You deserve a better life!  I know because I have walked in your shoes. Please get help today.